A Matter of Love
Imagine something that you've always known would happen. Something that you imagined over and over again what it would be like.
If it happened already, was it just like you imagined it would be?
And if not, be prepared. It probably won't be. Reality is harder and much more glorious than our imaginations.
My oldest sister got married a week ago Saturday. It was happy and beautiful and went by so quickly.
We used to talk about what it would be like when Deanna got married sometimes, about me being the maid of honor, about what her husband would be like, about her kids. More about that than anything else, though. We were the type of people who played orphanage and skipped over playing weddings.
As I stood at the top of the green-carpeted stairs, looking at Deanna and Stephen standing there (looking like a couple out of a magazine, so perfectly complementing each other), I thought of things that we had been worried about getting ready for the wedding.
It doesn't matter now, I thought. I was glad we didn't worry about details any more than we did. It didn't matter. They were getting married, whether we had the tables placed correctly or not. Whether I succeeded in doing lace on the cake or not. Whether the flowers were exactly what we wanted or not. Whether I succeeded in getting pictures of Deanna getting ready or not. Whether we would run out of cupcakes or live on them for the next eight days. Whether anyone got a picture of the marriage certificate or not.
We worry about details too much. If you won't remember something in a year, it's not worth getting upset about. And even if you will.
Who has time to worry about colors when there are wrongs to right? When there are relationships to build? When there is Scripture to read? When there are words to write? When there are little girls to hold? When there are prayers to say?
I love how weddings make you think about what is important in life.
Standing up there near to my sister, I realized it didn't matter if I arranged her train properly (I didn't) or if I was standing opposite Eric correctly (I couldn't tell) or if Kristen whispered, asking if Deanna had remembered to clean her glasses (she did). Or if Deanna had forgotten (I told Kristen she didn't, but I'm actually not sure).
No. What mattered was Deanna and Stephen's relationship and God and our relationship with them and the witness of the guests and the rest of their lives.
Details do matter. They matter immensely-when they affect relationships. When your dealing with details shows how you honor God or love your brother. When it gives joy and beauty, as the alternating soft purple and green napkins, stacks of old books, the perfect song for the slideshow, and the Chantilly lace cake did, then the details are worth it. When moving the tables closer, disposing of the cake pillars, inviting fewer people, deciding what color nail polish to use by yourself, or letting an awesome idea you had for a picture go pleases your sister or friend or brother-in-law, then it matters. (It also matters whether your mother gets to the wedding or not. It does not matter if you have to wait a while.)
What matters isn't your ideas being materialized. It's showing in every detail your love for Christ through your love for others. It's finding your own delight in what truly matters.